At this point, we were frequently singing about being on the

6 min readDec 6, 2020

This is a “good” section of the road to the Glass Butte obsidian camp and digging area. Barely wide enough at times for one vehicle and not many spots to make room for anything passing us.I realized I was the only one standing in my own way. And if I really wanted to be free — truly free — I had to face the most unpleasant, uncomfortable, painful parts of myself that I had been avoiding for years.Leaving the Glass Butte area, we decided to go west and find a campground. That led us into Bend, a major tourist area, and after checking a few crowded, no social distancing places, we found a small private campground in La Pine and set up camp — for the 2nd time that day. It was hard to believe it was still the same day.

The pandemic had created a host of issues we had not considered. Our plan was to get away and go camping and digging — but we quickly figured that agencies like BLM were not doing maintenance.

After a bit, I said what I’d really love to do is to go to the high desert and dig obsidian — but it was not a trip I wanted to do alone — especially in this pandemic time.

In a conscious relationship, there’s a commitment to growth and awareness. Both people know that, in order for the relationship to be healthy, they need to show up every day not only to their partner but to themselves.
In a conscious relationship, there’s a commitment to growth and awareness. Both people know that, in order for the relationship to be healthy, they need to show up every day not only to their partner but to themselves.
I thought about it and foresaw walking along the ocean [which I love to do] — but it mentally felt no different than walking along the river so I said thank you but not my thing — not now.

One highlight of this camping spot was that we saw some of the Perseid meteor showers. Another was being woken at sunrise by a murder of crows who were sitting in and on our camp chairs!

This middle of nowhere is in a Bureau of Land Management [BLM] area and we set up camp near a reservoir intending to relax and drive to Glass Butte the next day. The variety of birds was amazing — but then came the bugs! We thought they might dissipate but they got worse. None were biting but they were on and getting in everything. We decided to break camp, drive directly to Glass Butte, and set up at the small BLM campground near the obsidian.

When my partner and I started dating, I was completely aware of my strengths, weaknesses, fears, insecurities, hopes, dreams — everything. I knew myself, I knew what I had to improve and I knew what I had to let go of. I was no longer afraid to recognize my true self — and that’s self-love at its best.

I also realized that even though the reasons behind my fears were valid, I would always feel miserable if I kept clinging onto them. I had to change. And that’s exactly what I did.

I think it was my pandemic life catching up with me. I have worked at home for years, but I was never S.T.U.C.K. at home. My now infrequent trips to Costco are the highlights of my months. I live in a nice spot — on a river — and it’s summer — but even that river life lost its glimmer for me.My daughter-in-law said she’d love to go do that with me and so we started planning our camping-digging-for-obsidian vacation. We figured what foods we wanted, packed extra water, lots of fruit, camping gear, boots — and layers of clothing.The only reason why I was able to change my attachment style to secure, was because my desire for love and authenticity was getting bigger than my fear of vulnerability and abandonment.

My daughter-in-law asked me what I’d like to do — and I said get away somewhere — go someplace other than Costco! She said she’d watch my pets and I should go the coast — I’d be treated to a vacation.

Then suddenly there was no road! It had washed away! We sat there a bit shaken before backing down to a spot where we could turn around. Eventually, we got turned around and drove back to the “main” road. We thought there might be a better road to the campground, but nothing showed up as a possibility except the one we had just tried.

At this point, we were frequently singing about being on the

Written by Pungtajibon srfg